eaten twice

Loved by half of the country.

StoryKettle » eaten » eaten twice

Copyright © 2010, Michael M Wayman

I slept badly that night. Angelo held me tight like he always does, but I knew that the big one was coming and so did he.

Angelo took me to the railway station above the town, he knew that I might never come back again, I took the train to the big city, the capital city.

I rented a room, got a new identity, read every newspaper and magazine article about SB. I talked to newspaper reporters too. This had been the usual routine for me before Angelo. It was not going to be easy.

SB was loved by half of the country and hated by the other. I'm different, dislike yes, but hate no. All my emotions go into loving Angelo, I have no time to hate somebody.

SB was the most powerful politician in the country, he was also a lying bastard and a few other things I won't say here. He was not bad and nasty, no, he was really bad and nasty. He was always surrounded by women, his staff, his helpers, his bodyguards. How could I get close? How could I get to be alone with him?

I joined his staff as his international specialist. It was an interesting job, I enjoyed it. I talked to foreign reporters and TV, wrote and translated articles, and so on, but best of all, I could advise SB on foreign affairs. I knew all about politics in the whole continent, I had eaten politicians in the whole continent.

At first I wrote reports about foreign politics for SB, later I discussed it with SB, very interesting, but the bodyguards were always there.

What had I discovered about SB? Not much! He was always surrounded by women, but he was not interested in women, and not interested in men either. This had to be false, politicians need large quantities of sex and money – that is the way they work. I have always used sex to get close enough to a politician to eat him, but neither sex nor money was going to get me close enough to SB.

The weeks and months went by, every week I sent a picture postcard to Angelo:

Having fun, MUCH LOVE Essebella

Someone in the office told me that SB visited his lover in a secret hideaway in the mountains every weekend. Interesting!

Then the big break. I saw a bill for very expensive furniture on somebody's desk, the delivery address was in a little village in the mountains. BINGO! It took me some time to find it on the map, I had to buy a very detailed map.

That weekend I hired a car, dressed as a tourist, drove up in the mountains and wandered about. It took all weekend to find it, a very nice chalet, but well hidden from view. Outside the house was a big pile of empty packaging with the name of the furniture company on it. However no sign of SB.

A week later was a long holiday weekend and I was lucky.

SB was lying on the veranda soaking up the sun, lying naked on a sun lounger. Next to him was a very pretty boy, lying asleep in the sun. And nobody else, no bodyguards. This was my chance.

SB recognised me of course. He asked me not to be loud, not to wake up his boyfriend. He said he knew why I was there. I was his Nemesis. I was going to finish him off. He wanted to know how I would do it.

“You have a gun?”

“No gun!”


“No knife!”

“You have a handbag?”

“No weapon in it!” I dropped it.

“Then how? With your bare hands? You are smaller than me!”

“I will eat you.”

“Eat me?”

I ate him. He was not really bad and nasty, quite tasty really. I enjoyed him, very much.

Just before I had finished eating SB his boyfriend woke up. Was he unhappy! He was so much in love with SB. I felt so sorry for him. I made a big mistake. I ate him.

I will give you some advice. When you eat people, eat only one at a time. Two is too much. And eat people before they put on sun tan lotion.

The boyfriend did not taste as good as SB. It's true, I was being greedy. It took much longer to eat the boyfriend, but I did feel good, really high, really bloated, really heavy.

I couldn't stand up, I couldn't get away, I had to lie down, I felt so good, I was going gaga with happiness, I was sleepy, I pulled a blanket over me for shade and I drifted off into la la land.