eaten soon

Two dogs, a goat and three tourists.

StoryKettle » eaten » eaten soon

Copyright © 2010, Michael M Wayman

It was the middle of the night, the tourists had all gone to bed, the crickets chirped in the long grass and Angelo was deep in me.

“Angelica, I don't want to disappoint my mother, but we must wait a bit before having children.”

The honeymoon was great, Angelo was great, but when we got off the ferry there was a policeman waiting for us. A police inspector had been sent from the big city to investigate the missing mayor and he had a lot of questions for me.

Everyone in the little town knew who had done it and everyone knew what had happened to the mayor. It must have been me, as I was the only foreigner in the town, apart from the hundreds of tourists. Foreign was anybody not born in the town. And everyone had their own idea how I did it.

People I hardly knew would stop me in the street and say how glad they were that the mayor was gone and how I dropped him from the railway bridge onto a passing coal train, or pushed him down a storm drain, or buried him under the plazza.

One of Angelo's brothers said that we ought to have mayor's soup, mayor's goulasch and mayor's pie on the menu. Angelo looked at him and he closed his mouth.

As I said, the police inspector had many questions for me and I had few answers. Yes, I had seen him that night, for the first and last time in my life. No, I did not go to meet him, I only wanted a marriage form. All true.

No, I didn't know where the mayor was now. Do you know where the lunch you ate two weeks ago is now? Me neither!

I told him that the mayor had taken his clothes off, but why I didn't know, the mayor was half my size. What clothes? I asked if the mayor's office had been searched. The mayor's clothing was found nicely folded in a drawer of his desk. The cleaner had put them there, she did that every morning.

I told him about the storm drain story, the plazza theory and the funny menu ideas.

Under the plazza several dead cats were found, but no mayor. The town square looked bad and after all the digging much worse. Angelo paid for a new plazza with trees, real nice.

The two men who did the storm drains worked very hard, every day in the Storm Drain. They drank coffee all day and beer all evening in a shabby little café called the Storm Drain in a back street. No, they did not want to look for bodies in the storm drains.

Yes, they found bodies, two dogs, a goat and three tourists, but no mayor. The storm drains were badly blocked, somebody put the pressure on. The two men spent weeks clearing the storm drains. Were they unhappy! Were we glad! At the end of the summer there were the rain storms of the century, there was water everywhere, the roads were washed out, no electricity or phone, the ferry could not leave the harbour full of sunk boats and floating tree trunks, the sea was brown as far as one could see, but no home was flooded.

I did not tell the police inspector that I had eaten the mayor in self-defence. I don't think that he would have believed me.

It was the middle of the tourists in bed with the crickets chirping... “Angelo, the police inspector is a nice man, he likes the life in this seaside town, he is shy, he is lonely. Your sister Maria is shy, she is lonely.”

Maria helped me in the restaurant. Most of the day Maria was in the kitchen and I with the customers, later came more of the family to help.

Maria was very confused, how had she helped me get rid of the mayor? The police inspector asked her questions for days and then for weeks. He stopped questioning me.

“Angelica, the police inspector is a nice man, he likes the life in this seaside town, he is shy, he is lonely. I like him, I like him a lot. Is that wrong, Angelica? I really do like him. I feel all funny when I'm with him. By the way, Angelica, you have to go to the meeting of the elders at ten tonight.”

Who were the elders? And where were they meeting? And what did they want? I guessed right, the elders, ten women and eight men, were the heads of the big families in the town. They decided the important stuff in the town, not the mayor. Angelo's mother and father were there.

I walked up to the table, they looked at me and I looked at them. No word was spoken. There was an envelope in the middle of the table, it was fat with money, there were the two letters SB crossed out on the envelope.

They accepted me, they trusted me, they had a task for me, I could not break that trust, I looked them in the eye, I took the envelope, I held it to my heart, I left the room.