ziekenhuis

Why does she hit me with her you‑know‑whats?

StoryKettle » GRANNY » ziekenhuis

Copyright © 2019, Michael M Wayman

I wake and see that Olive, my daughter, is having another fit – she’s bashing Larry with… No, I don’t want to say that, but a curious thought goes through my head. Would Johnnie like that if I did that to him?

I don’t get any more time to think, Johnnie rushes in with two men in white coats, Olive gets a shot of sedative and falls to the floor.


I can’t move much, my whole left leg and my whole right arm are in plaster; but why does Olive hit me with her you‑know‑whats? I don’t say anything, I know that she can’t help it, I think she thinks that I enjoy it.

I’m terribly worried about Florence.


I can’t move much, I’ve got to keep my guts straight, I had an operation to push my guts back into the right place, the most popular operation for men, but it went wrong. So I had to have more operations, I’m feeling delicate. Why does Olive hit me with her you‑know‑whats? I don’t say anything, I know that she can’t help it, I think she thinks that I enjoy it.

I do enjoy it, but why does she have to do it stark naked in front of everyone? I know that she can’t help it, she is having a fit.


Why is Larry so important to me?


I can’t move much, I’m all trussed up like a turkey at Xmas in my wonderful shiny red suit that my darling husband once bought me. I’m recovering from my violent fit, I really enjoyed it.

Later on I will probably have a quiet fit, just awful, lots of daemons and crazy monsters who want to eat me. I will be terrified, I will want to scream, but I won’t, I won’t be able to move.

The door bell rings.


“Hello Mrs Price, hello Liz. You have come to visit granny, haven’t you? Do come in!”

“Hello Bill, I hear that you are looking after everybody and...”

“I’m just helping out, the two district nurses will be here soon.”

“Hello Ethel, hello Elizabeth. Welcome to Olive’s convalescent home.”

“Hello Thelma, how are you doing?”

“I’m recovering slowly, but the others are not so good. Olive is recovering from a fit and is rather tied up at the moment. Her husband George is recovering from several difficult hernia operations and has to lie quite still. Larry has a leg and an arm in full plaster and also has to lie quite still. And my granddaughter Florence is not responding.”

“Liz, why don’t you and me push Florence around the park – I think that it is important that Florence sees other things – let’s leave granny and your mother to have a good chinwag.”