embajador

Carry him to the river and throw him in.

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Copyright © 2021, Michael M Wayman

And there he stood. He did not introduce himself. No, he started in rage, he continued in rage, he couldn’t stop…

“Stop! I think what you are trying to tell us is that the president of Fatland does not like that we told the press that we had seen him kiss an aeroplane and fall down the steps. Further more he wants us to deny the story. AND, AND, AND! If we don’t do so, you will personally organise a couple of thugs to beat us up.”

He continued his rant, he spoke poorly, his mother tongue was not Spanish, probably Portuguese. He extended his rant: the president of Fatland did not like Thinland and wanted to invade Thinland. And the president had thirteen reasons why.

He had just restarted his rant, when I looked at Friday, Friday looked at Six‑Oh‑Ate and said: Pick him up, carry him to the river and throw him in.

The man did not like this, he screamed, he struggled. Six‑Oh‑Ate carried him away, the crowd in the street cheered.


The next day we discovered from the internet that the ambassador to Fatland was rescued from the fountains in front of the cathedral by tourists. “Every major city on this planet has a big river flowing through it, but not this one.”


“Oh look, it’s our dear friend the ambassador to Fatland coming to see us with two of his friends.” Friday was looking out the window. I looked at Friday, Friday looked at Six‑Oh‑Ate and said: Go down to the street and ‘it ‘im!

Six‑Oh‑Ate went down to the street, she picked up the two thugs with her two hands, she pummelled them stupid with her third hand. The crowd thumped the ambassador stupid, for some reason they didn’t like him.


The next day we discovered from the internet that the ambassador to Fatland and two of his staff were rescued by police and taken to hospital.


“Oh look, it’s our dear friend the ambassador to Fatland coming to see us with ten of his friends, the crowd on the street don’t like him, they don’t like the president of Fatland.”


The next day we discovered from the internet that the ambassador to Fatland and ten of his staff had been deported by the government of Thinland.


We didn’t like the president of Fatland either. After some days we decided: I looked at Friday, Friday looked at Six‑Oh‑Ate and said to it:

Go to the capital city of Fatland,
find the House of the Deputies,
wait until the president of Fatland
gives a speech to the deputies and
start a fight with him.